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Celebrity Zoo: Commentary on Starring: Da Brat, Christopher Knight, Joanie Lauer, Verne Troyer, Jane Wiedlin, Marcus Schenkenberg, Adrianne Curry
Episode
1: Nobody Puts Mini-Me in A Corner, Except Himself
Episode 6- 2/20/05 Early in this episode, Chris decides, inexplicably, to accept Adrianne's advances, but she then complains he talks down to her. It's hard to watch Adrianne clumsily running through all her tricks. I'm beginning to wonder if Chris isn't stringing her along on some low-level frequency. He admits she is a disaster but surely hasn't successfully shut her down and yet refuses to "green light" her. Ron Jeremy shows up in a diaper as Cupid to introduce an evening of dating. After questioning prospective suitors, they each pick a date. Verne humorously calls himself a tripod and chooses a woman because she lets him touch her breasts. We find out Joanie hates books. Marcus like a pretty girl and a good time. Adrianne asks inane questions, and I never did understand Da Brat's question. Newlywed Jane gets to set up a fetish station as a host. She's disgusted by Adrianne's stripping behavior there and obvious ploy for Chris' attention. Adrianne cannot be subtle and knows no fear of overkill. Verne spits in the "serenity pond", and Da Brat's date drinks too much and throws up. Adrianne tries to make Chris' date uncomfortable because being a jerk is so attractive. She's too jealous. It makes her look insecure. Chris likes his date but can't be giving his phone number out. Come on. It's not like he's a former New Kid on the Block or something. Coolia: I always enjoy seeing Ron Jeremy,
even if he's wearing a diaper. I'm sure it's not the most ridiculous costume
he's worn in his porn career (The Devil in Miss Jones II comes
to mind). Jane reveals another wacky side to her personality - she is
into B&D and likes to wear latex! She's lucky she's married and doesn't
have to actively participate in the surreal dating game. So far this season
we've learned that Verne is a breast man, as exemplified by his sushi-nipple-rubbing
in Episode 1 and by his groping of his prospective date here. Da Brat
cuts to the chase, wanting to know if her prospective dates would be strong
enough to pick her up and bump her against the wall during sex. I am surprised
that is not one of the questions in the eHarmony
personality profile. She later dismisses her date for vomiting, stating
that he must not be a thug because he can't hold his liquor. He can blame
Joanie for passing the Courvoisier. She's a bad influence. Adrianne's
boorishness is becoming intolerable, but I have to penalize Chris for
not (a) leaving the double date to go on his own and avoid Adrianne's
mistreatment of his date or (b) telling Adrianne to knock it off. Chris
is beginning to adopt the stand-offish air of Jordan
Knight of Season 3 and it's not attractive. Maybe these two do deserve
each other. The episode ends with Joanie up in the middle of the night
inflating or deflating a shelf full of basketballs for reasons that are
not made clear. If Chris is so busy questioning female motives, why does
he not ponder the meaning of Joanie's strange nocturnal missions?
Coolia’s weekly rankings:
Nerdia’s weekly rankings:
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