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Now I've Seen Everything!
Haikus for Skymall

from Ape Culture: Haiku Capital of the World!

By Molly Denver, Mary Ladd & Julie Wiskirchen

Ape Culture Salutes Our Favorite Skymall Item: The Garden Baby!

The worst idea that
Anyone ever had was
The Garden Baby

See this poor baby:
Turned to stone at birth cos her
Mom is Medusa.

A half a baby?
I think there is a blender
Joke in there somewhere.

Take your stone hands off
My baby! She still has soft
Spots on her head.

Newsflash! Baby found
In garden, safe. Police are
Questioning gnomes.

Do your best to keep
Raccoons out of the garden.
They will claw the baby.

Strolling along in
The back garden. "What is this?"
"Oh. Just a baby."

Where oh where is he?
Where did I leave my baby?
Ahh, I see- the yard.

It's hard to tell if
The baby is drooling or
Wet with morning dew

Read Ape Culture's collection of Skymall Haiku

Read more Ape Culture poetry

Add your garden baby haiku here.


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