Ape Culture - Richard Simmons Counsels Fat Pets

Chiquita

BEFORE

AFTER

Dear Chiquita,

Your story is truly inspirational! Reading it gave me such a burst of energy. I did 500 jumping jacks and skipped rope for two miles! Now I've got sweat stains on my brand new tank top--and I don't even care!

Cheekers, you should be very proud of yourself for "making the connection" and losing the weight. I'm thrilled I was an inspiration to you, and I'm so glad that you've found a new family that cares about your health and loves you to pieces.

Keeping the weight off can be just as difficult as losing the weight in the first place, so remember to avoid those nasty ol' habits and keep exercising. Now that your leg has healed, perhaps you can join me as one of the cast members for my new doggy exercise video, "Fetching for your Health." In this video, I will show that fetching is not the mindless game that most pets and owners believe it to be--it can provide crucial daily exercise.

Thanks for writing, Chiquita! I'm getting misty-eyed, so I better sign off and get a hankie. I'm enclosing some bacon and cheese flavored rice cakes for you.

Love,
Richard